Katie Beck was a financially independent career women in her early 30s when she discovered she was pregnant. But she was in an unhealthy and unstable relationship, so she had reservations about having a child with her boyfriend. Beck told Live Action News, “When I got pregnant, I just thought it wasn’t the right situation in which to bring a child.” When Beck told her boyfriend about the pregnancy, he showed no enthusiasm but didn’t tell her to get an abortion. Still, Beck felt it would be best, given that she had a career
and didn’t want to parent a child with him. “There were selfish reasons behind my decision to end my pregnancy,” Beck said. “I told my boyfriend I had decided to have an abortion and he agreed.” She went to Planned Parenthood without talking to anyone regarding her decision, other than her boyfriend, who drove her to the clinic but did not go inside with her. “I was five weeks along and had a surgical abortion. I remember the awful vacuum sound of the suction,” she said. “Immediately afterward, I felt relief but then the guilt and shame set in.” As she was sitting in one of the cheap, plastic chairs in the “recovery room,” a man approached her and whispered that he’d seen her file and knew about the company where she worked. He told her not to tell anyone at work about the abortion. “The company where I worked was conservative,” Beck said. “Apparently, that was a red flag to this guy. He told me, ‘They’re not your friends, we’re your friends.’ I didn’t know who he was or how he got ahold of my private information.” The romance with her boyfriend had ended and Beck felt she could cope on her own. For a long time, she didn’t tell anyone about her abortion. She was involved in athletics and participated in competitions, so she felt certain she’d move beyond the experience easily. Yet, right after the abortion, she began to drink at night. “I’d have a little wine at night, just something to numb my pain,” Beck said. About 10 years later, she met a man who would become her husband. He was a Christian...and a pro-life advocate. Beck said, “I needed to tell him what I had done. But he chose to stay with me regardless. I was 40 years old when we got married. We had a son together. I thought I had done a good job of burying the past.” Yet she did get counseling for the depression and anxiety that gripped her. She only brought up the abortion once at an appointment. “The counselor told me I had made the best decision at the time,” Beck said “Nothing else was ever said.” Beck’s dark secret weighed heavily on her, binding her with chains of guilt and shame. “I had stuffed so much down, never coming face-to-face with what I had done,” she said. But after her son was born, Beck realized how much help she needed. “The struggle of new motherhood was the catalyst that put me on the road to healing,” Beck said.
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